great is Thy faithfulness.

this week is a terror week. i'm being slammed with assignments, presentations, projects and essays left right center. but while the process of doing work is tiring and sluggish (oh so sian), my mind is constantly challenged by said assignments, presentations, projects and essays.

one to re-examine again my own stance and personal beliefs with regards to people with special needs and autism especially. i do miss my days of volunteering at autism children's center.

another one to think about the social implications of the current education landscape and the people involved.

but more importantly, this week was more than just thoughts on school work. i find myself thinking more, and i do welcome it. i hate to find my mind idling away like a car stuck in a traffic jam.

probably the one that carries the most weight is the news of my beloved cousin, all of 18 years old, lying in the neuro ICU, her brain swollen, on a respirator, "stable but critical", unable to predict if she will ever wake up and recover. to get her A-level results. to go to university. to get married and have children.

and it thoroughly pains me, that something i always watch on tv and taken for granted, can hit so close to home. as much as i try not to admit, it is just different with family. with SQ's and HY's homegoing, the sadness i felt was more distant comparatively, but i can replace the sadness and anguish with joy that they have been called home to be with the Lord, which is a most wonderful thing.

i think about how life is so fleeting. i watched the curious case of benjamin button, and this one truth stood out to me, among others (love has to happen at the right time for both individuals = timing is everything).

"the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away" was mentioned. as the clock moves backwards and lives were lost in the war, benjamin button was born to age backwards. when the pastor so-called "healed" and made old frail-looking benjamin walk (you would know that he would walk 'cos he's again backwards, so this healing is NOT TRUE), the pastor dropped and died. (note: this is a plot device for the theme).

as the movie closes, death is everywhere. from the female character, to the victims of hurricane katrina. to the clock which moves backwards taken down from the new orleans train station, abandoned in a warehouse, and drowned by the incoming flood waters.

i've been reading psalm 39. i was reminded again how fragile life is. David's psalms are always filled with much description of his anguish and pain.

"...Certainly every man at his best state is but vapor."
- Psalm 39:5b

"...You make his beauty melt away like a moth;
Surely every man is vapor."
- Psalm 39:11b

vapor, lighter than air. that's us. insignificant, small, nothing.

"“LORD, make me to know my end,
And what is the measure of my days,
That I may know how frail I am."
- Psalm 39:4

But we can rejoice. for we can hope in the Lord.

“And now, Lord, what do I wait for?
My hope is in You."
- Psalm 39:7

sunday's class with pastor mitch was a timely reminder again to seek the Lord first above all else. before doing anything. after every terrible news. that i should be conscious of the Lord through each day. and that makes coping with difficult times better and more manageable. that we can overcome anything, because though we are weak, we are made perfect in His strength, grace and mercy. that even when we sin, falter and slip away, He is always faithful. He is always there, comforting me with His Word.

and that's why this song (in title of post) is held dear to my heart this week.

great is Thy faithfulness
great is Thy faithfulness
morning by morning
new mercies i see

all i have needed
Thy hand hath provided
great is Thy faithfulness
Lord, unto me

pardon for sin and
a peace that endureth
Thine own dear presence
to cheer and to guide

strength for today and
bright hope for tomorrow,
blessings all mine,
with ten thousand beside

- great is Thy faithfulness