at the end of all things good,

the holidays are here and i finally have time to come here. my sanctuary.

the last 10 weeks have been kind of crazy. sometimes, i enjoy my work and the people i get to work with (students and colleagues alike) so much that i forget that it's not always a bed of roses. the stresses of working, the burden that i carry whenever i get reminded that my work deals with the lives of young people, that nagging need to strive for perfection and acceptance, that want to bring glory to the Lord and live my life as a testimony to the grace that i've been given.

sometimes, i'm glad i have a (physical) place to turn to in the middle of the work day. to reflect. think. cry out. pray. whenever a silly mistake was made. whenever big mistakes were made. whenever.

***

watching the whole slew of season and series finales the past few weeks to destress from work. thankful. 4 outstanding finales ought to be mentioned here.

1. house - just because it was shot entirely with a DSLR in HD. the canon 5d mkII was used, together with a mix of canon primes (i suspect they are below f1.4) and zeiss zooms (24-70mm, 70-200mm, if memory serves me well). the result was no different from the regular tv shows, but with an added bonus. the tremendous f-stops used ensured amazing an array of depths of field. and even though some scenes may seem out of focus, it fit into the storyline well. and did i mention cuddy and house are finally trying to make it work? :)

2. flashforward - went out with a cliffhanger-open-to-interpretation. the practicalities and business of broadcast media in america led to the axing of a once-promising show. and i'm still quite sad. the show was bouncing back from a few episodes of bad writing and script, but got axed way too soon. farewell flashforward.

3. lost - went out with a poignant smile, fully redeemed. in the end, the important questions were answered. the flash-sideways world was explained. our characters got the redemption they needed. and they moved on, together, to whatever comes after.

after all the adventure, mythology, spirituality, science, faith, philosophy, history, and the countless lessons and knowledge i've picked up watching the series, there are no regrets, no yearning for more (like i usually do with series finales), no burning questions (just a few small ones to satisfy my science brain), but just a quiet, poignant smile as jack closed his eyes and step into the light.

it also reminds me of being redeemed by the blood of Christ, reconciled with God, justified by faith, and the life in Heaven that awaits after we are done in this life. i used to struggle with the reality of a Heavenly Kingdom where there are no tears and sorrow, no sadness and fears. but God, sitting on His throne, where the angels sing and i can find rest for all eternity. though i still struggle with this sometimes (thanks to my science brain), i'm glad for a tv show that can remind me of this fact.

4. grey's anatomy - the season finale left me at the edge of my seat as charles, alex and derek lay dying and a grieving man who lost his wife went on a 2-hr (unrealistic, yes. pumps up the drama equation, yes.) shooting rampage in the hospital before committing suicide.

after i finished the show and started to think about what i saw, i got these flashbacks to the time where i was on exchange in the US. sitting in my poli-sci class, reading breaking news off my classmate's laptops about a shooting that happened on campus. MY campus. and i was ON campus, not at home. without details, my mind started to go crazy. is the gun man still going around shooting people? is he going to walk into my classroom with that loaded gun? it was a crazy time and i hardly paid attention. when i finally got hold of the details, the gun man had shot himself after he shot his ex-girlfriend in the chest 5 times, an ex-girlfriend he had been stalking. i'll never forget those crazy minutes (40 or so minutes) of fearing for my life.

and a few weeks later, the virginia tech massacre happened across the country i was in. my nightmare. and it is a sobering wakeup call for america to rethink its gun and ammunition laws. and it's also a gentle prod to be thankful for singapore.

ETA: i'm shaking my head as i type this after i saw a CNN breaking news tweet about a man going on a shooting rampage in the cumbria region of the UK, killing 12 people. they just found the shooter's body. cumbria is the region where lake district is, a beautiful place i visited last year. it's unthinkable. seriously.

one more thing that caught my attention in the grey's finale. the shooter asked the people he met whether or not they were surgeons. if the answer is yes, he shoots. this closely mirrors the rumors that surfaced during the aftermath of the columbine shootings, that the shooters asked the people if they believed in God, and if yes, they shoot. the rumors proved to not be true.

however, i thought about if it were true, how do people face such situations with the tremendous amount of courage that is needed. would we all respond like how Peter did, bearing in mind that a positive response would mean suffering, pain and death. or would we stand up for our faith and take the bullet, like so many disciples and apostles and servants of God today did? would we have that courage?

***

and yet i know, there is still hope in prayer as i grow in my faith. as we studied from the book of Jeremiah during YAG retreat, i can't help but change my mind about Jeremiah. i used to think he was really whiny and emo (esp. after studying the book of Lamentations).

but looking at things from a bigger perspective, i can see why the tears came as he prayed. his people were deliberately rebelling against God and not heeding his advice or warnings. Judah was suffering and yet Jeremiah's words fell on deaf ears. what was so outstanding about Jeremiah was how faithful and persevering he was as he served God. despite all that he went through, he still remained a faithful servant, and he constantly went back to God in prayer. that, to me, was really special. and inspiring.

vigil.

interrupting the spring break photos. photos here from the vigil for the virginia tech massacre victims. it's been almost a week. the mourning week, as declared by president bush.

the sun sets as i walked to the red square. seems such a beautiful evening.


the candle in the wind.

after the vigil itself, where 2 men, including the president of UW's "student union", called ASUW here, spoke to beautiful organ music coming from denny hall. then a moment's silence as the denny hall clock tower chimed 33 times. people were sobbing and crying and tearing, even when they didn't know the victims. somehow the bond as college students is so strong among everyone. their loss is like our own.

a group of people started to gather in a circle after the vigil.

prayers. people of all faith, all nationalities, all ages came together. songs, prayers, experiences.




america, the land of the free. and the price of freedom.

may there be comfort in every trial. light in every darkness. peace in every tribulation.

dark days.

so i think some of you may have heard about the virginia tech massacre. a korean american 23 year old english major killed 32 people in his campus before turning the gun unto himself. 32 students, professors were killed, mostly execution style. many have expressed outrage and tremendous grief. it is very very shocking and disappointing when i watch the news about his videos and photos that he sent to NBC in new york before going on his rampage. it's sad when i read about the immense grief that the virginia people are going through. i went for UW's vigil memorial at the red square last night. lit a candle and listened to the clock tower bell chime 32 times, in remembrance of the victims. with 200+ of my fellow UW students. maybe this will prompt america to tighten their gun laws even more. reports here.

ok. other than horrible tragedy, school has been hectic with assignments and readings and midterms are coming up! not to mention a presentation that i should start on before my sisters arrive in seattle, and a group project. hence the lack of updates. apologies!

here i continue for washington dc. i realised i took a LOT of pictures in DC. maybe because i was there for 4 days! darn my flight delay, or i could have seen new york more. speaking of which, DC is near virginia tech. =(

i thought this was cute. took it in the subway train. in DC it was very obvious that their rule for escalators is to stand on the right. the left is for walking people. just like tokyo. in singapore it's to stand on the left right? now i'm so used to the right i think i would need some time to change back to left in sg. so i'm NOT an escalefter! =)

we arrived at one of the busiest train stations in DC, union station. it's connected to the amtrak (US's train service that connects cities and states all over) too. it's really big and grand and has a fantastic food court and great shopping!

external of the train station. it was really white and blinding 'cos of the sun shining brightly.

we were here!

at the fountain.

walking to the capitol. beautiful day.

back of the capitol. it was so funny 'cos we happened to strike up a conversation with this man who was really nice and very eager to find out more about Singapore. turns out he was the president of a political consultant company and one of his clients was the democratic party. yayy for democrats. =) my political science module has opened my eyes to american politics a little more. and he is going to singapore next year. haha. he gave us his card too. check out his company here.

beautiful statues around the capitol.

me and the capitol. the US capitol "serves as the location for the United States Congress, the legislative branch of the U.S. federal government". wikipedia is great for information.

in front of the capitol is the reflection pool. i sat here and just looked out at the national mall and the washington monument in front. great place to think and chill.

me thinking. haaaa.

next we went to the library of congress. (oh we toured the inside of capitol. more later) while waiting to go in this little girl was running around and playing outside. and i love her skirt! it's so boho.

the majestic and beautiful interior of the library of congress. it is the "de facto national library of the United States and the research arm of the United States Congress" and one of the most important libraries in the world.

more beautiful interiors.

and more beautiful interiors. so glad they allowed photography.

nice paintings too.

where we were. the library of congress has a few buildings. the visitors' center was at the thomas jefferson (one of US's former presidents) building.


outside library of congress. wind was very very strong.

the department of justice. their court of law. superbly grand. end of the day! we went back to union train station to shop! and eat dinner. hehhh.

the next day we woke up really really early because we had to get in line to queue up for tickets to tour the inside of the capitol building. and by the time we got there, at 8.30am (ticket distribution starts at 9am, lonely planet did recommend going at 8am but we couldn't be THAT early. sleep is important, esp when travelling.) the line was already starting to snake around. and it just kept growing and growing.

but the sun was gone. gloomy day. we got tickets for the 9.45am tour and it lasted about 1 hour 30 mins. security, as usual, was super tight. no food and drinks allowed at all.

the dome thing you see at the exterior shots, here is the interior. an artist painted the top and it's really high and one time he almost fell to his death. the painting shows george washington surrounded by angels and clouds. very nice. i bought a postcard with the painting. so touristy i know. the painting is called The Apotheosis of Washington by Constantino Brumidi.

the paintings all around the dome. the tour guide was really informative and she was this cute girl who is about my age or older. and he just rattled on all the history and facts and ancedotes behind the paintings that described most of the major events in US history. like christopher columbus discovering america and the independence in 1776.

this used to be a study/reading room/workplace for members of congress, but because of it's elliptical shape or something, the sound bounces and when a person is speaking at one spot, softly, it can be heard at one particular spot across the room. our tour guide tested this amazing physics thing and it was amazing! she was across the room meters away, and i could hear her speaking softly, as though she was just right next to me! anyway they found it really annoying so they decided to not use the room and it became a place to display statues. haa. there are many statues spread over the whole capitol. and every state in US will donate at least 1 statue of a famous american that hailed from their state. quite interesting.

that's the weird shape of the ceiling of the statue room.

this white spot marks the center of washington dc. right in the middle.

the former courts, now no longer used, so its for us visitors to see.

the way to the toilets. so nice right.

one last shot just after exiting the capitol. more info on the capitol here.

i forgot why i took this shot. it has been too long.

my sticker! its good because all of such tours are free, like many things in washington dc. museums and all. so it's really good for budget travelers like us. you just need to wake up early to get the free tix.

alright, not wanting to crash your web browser, i shall continue another time. back to work!